One of the most common reasons for divorce is a lack of compatibility and communication. Before saying “I do,” people who want to enter into a lifetime marriage should certainly put their hopes and history on the table. That way, they’ll be ready for any challenges they might face as partners.
1. “How are we going to combine finances?”
It’s important to think about how you’ll manage the money you’ll be making in the future. In addition to one shared account to which both partners contribute each month, each individual can need their own separate stash. A number of how much is required monthly can be negotiated and settled upon, based on how much their wages are.
2. “What is your exact debt?”
Confirming each others’ real debts can help you both to plan ahead on how to handle them. Nobody would enjoy being ambushed with their new spouse’s debt upon getting married. Anyone would feel betrayed if they only found out about the actual amount owed by their partner after the wedding. Plus, this could really affect the trust they have in their partner.
3. “How are we saving for our retirement?”
All must retire from work at some point. And being married necessitates including one another in one’s retirement plans. You should budget for at least enough food for two people, as well as medical expenses in case one of you becomes ill.
4. “Do you plan to have kids?”
Not everyone who wants to marry wants to start a family. Even if both partners want children, there are other issues to consider, such as parenting styles, what you’d do if the children had special needs, or how you’d respond if they turned out to be different than you anticipated.
5. “What will you do if we’re unable to have kids?”
Getting children is a necessity for certain people. So, if a couple can’t have children for any reason, they’ll have to figure out what to do next. They could decide to adopt a child, use a surrogate, undergo IVF, or get divorced and marry someone else.
6. “ How will we split our chores? ”
Chores could appear to be insignificant, but they could be the catalyst for a full-fledged brawl. This is because a person will feel stressed if they have to do all of the chores on their own. To keep the peace in the house, it’s a good idea to discuss the chores that each person is responsible for.
7. “What do you consider cheating?”
While we can believe that everybody understands what cheating entails, the word may mean different things to different people. For instance, one person may consider kissing to be cheating, while another may consider simply catching up with an ex to be unacceptable. Some people believe that falling in love with someone else is a form of cheating. To prevent misunderstandings, a couple should discuss how relaxed they are with each other’s proximity to other people.
8. “What are your dreams and future plans?”
“How do you see yourself in the next 5 to 30 years?” This may sound like an interview question, but a person’s goals may differ from their partner’s definition of happiness in marriage. One may be willing to suffer as an artist before breaking through, while the other may simply want a secure life with a steady income.
9. “What are your deal breakers?”
Everyone has pet peeves, and it’s important to share them with one another so that living together is bearable. For example, one person may feel compelled to keep things in order, while the other may prefer a more chaotic setting. A consensus could be achieved if these issues are resolved early on.
10. “What are your plans for caring for and providing for your parents?”
Parents may grow old and, in some cases, become ill, necessitating their treatment. Decisions like whether or not you want to live with them, who will look after them, and how much money you want to set aside to provide for them should all be on the list of things a couple should think about before marrying.
